My backstory is I joined this party to forget about my backstory.

“It is a period of civil war…”

“You find yourself standing on a dark fairway.”

Make no mistake, the Rogue is on the offense.

Hashtag #notacrook

Even porn sites know that “barely legal” means 18+.

Wizard: “I cast detect on the bowl.”

DM: “it’s a bowl.”

Wizard: “I cast detect on the chair.”

DM: “It’s a chair.”

Wizard: “Fine, I eat the chowder.”

DM: “The spoon is a mimic. It latches onto your face and causes 35 points of damage.”

5 years old and already an understudy of Satan!

Animal: “I’m on fire, do you mind?”

Druid: “No, I don’t mind at all.”

Nothing like ATLA to make me go from melancholy to giggling like an idiot in no time flat.

“Confused but supportive.”

6yo DM: “You encounter a corpse wearing a ring of jumping.”

As a liberal Elder Scrolls fan, I had to become a social justice stealth archer.

“Why?”

“Because it’s a mimic.”

Honestly, why do DMs feel the need to try and wipe the party? DMs should be hoping the party succeeds because the party is usually going to find a way to wipe without their assistance.

Dungeon Master Waller is forming a kind of… Suicide Squad.

When you stand next to water for too long and mud crabs converge on your location.

Gotta get the unlucky out of my system first.

“Suddenly a swarm of BumbleBears appear in front of you.”

Players: “A… what of WHAT??”