No one else then the parties messaging can see that the communication even occurs.

Agreed.

You might want check your dns record

10.0.0.0/8 ip addresses are not publicly routable.

Try https://flathub.org/en/apps/me.iepure.devtoolbox

Couldn’t be happier with them. They just work and announce ahead of time about any maintenance. Have a storage box from them for backups and a vps for other uses. I do my backups with pika-backup (a borg frontend).

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Missionary_Church_of_Kopimism