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Cake day: December 4th, 2024

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  • This is kind of related to something that’s been bothering me lately. I’ve lived with unmedicated ADHD for my entire life which was originally incorrectly diagnosed as major depressive disorder. So spent over a decade repeatedly playing pharmacology roulette cycling through various antidepressants none of which worked (because depression wasn’t the root issue). All the while I was just barely holding down a job I could barely stand, alienating myself from everyone I knew, and just barely avoiding giving myself a shotgun slug root canal. Needless to say I was stressed as fuck.

    Then I got properly diagnosed with ADHD, put on meds that actually worked amazingly, got a new job I loved with my newfound executive function, and generally got my life into shape. This just so happened to take place at the end of 2024. So, despite the entire fucking world falling apart around me and everyone being stressed, I am relatively stress free for the first time in my life. It’s a weird thing where everything globally is more fucked than I can even fully properly conceive of and yet despite that I personally have never felt better. The two things aren’t related but It still feels weird being happiest I’ve ever been when the world as I knew it is falling apart.

    Anyways, that’s a very long way to say that sometimes stress doesn’t coincide with the end of the world.






  • My secret is compartmentalization. Whenever one of those thoughts about practically every western countries sprint into facism or our planet swiftly becomming uninhabitable pops up, I just file that thought away in the existential horror box before reattaching the chains holding that box closed and finding a nice quiet mental corner to hide it in.

    Plus if there’s ever a time where I need a mental breakdown then that box is always there for me, lurking in my brain like an aging bottle of perchloric acid forgotten in a chemistry lab cubbord slowly precipitating highly unstable explosive peroxides.